What Did You Say?

I love the game of baseball.  I love all aspects of it.  I've learned a lot from being around baseball for years and from watching MLB and college games on TV.  One thing I can’t help but notice are the number of slang terms used.  There is virtually an entire language dedicated to describing play on the field, pitching or hitting. Some of these terms actually make me giggle like a 12 year old kid.  They sound so, hmmm, well, they sound dirty….naughty. 

Terms such as:      

Go Deep

Backdoor Slider

Up and In

Down the Pipe

Find a Hole

Ride Your Horse

Meat

Power Stroke

Get a Rip

You're Up

Switch Hitter

Squeeze Play

So are they dirty or is it just me? Those of you who know me, already know that I have a warped sense of humor.  I find it entertaining to hear the coaches shouting out this baseball jargon during the games.  Or better yet, to hear MLB announcers use them on TV.  

But it can't just be me.  After all, David Letterman even had a Top Ten list for Punchlines to Dirty Baseball Jokes.   

Think about it, baseball terms used to describe sexual encounters have been around forever.  Whoever started the whole thing should be awarded a medal or have a building named after them or something.  It's such a simple idea and, sometimes, it probably makes describing sex easier for some people.

And the best part about it? It's become widespread—when you tell someone you hit a home run last night, they'll probably get your point.

Remember back in high school when baseball terms were used to describe how far you got with a boy or girl that you liked?  The basic rules applied, and the terms were simple—first base, second base, third base and a home run, just the basic baseball terms.

First base just meant kissing, not necessarily tongue kissing.  Second base involved tongue kissing and above the belt fondling. And yes, clothes were still in the equation.  If you made it to third it usually meant that there was some below the belt exploring.  Obviously a home run was sex, in every case.

In this day and age I’m sure the terms have expanded and are much more specific.  Since we are adults now, a lot more factors have been introduced into the sexual arena, or ummm….well, maybe for some anyhow.  The terms are better and much more detailed.  Ground rule double?  You wanted to have sex, but forgot protection.  You got the bases loaded?  You are in the hub of a threesome.  The terms make it less awkward to talk about even the most outrageous sexual encounters.

So next time you are at dinner and you eavesdrop on a “baseball” conversation at the next table, listen closely.  They may or may not actually be talking about the sport of baseball.   Regardless, if it’s me that’s doing the eavesdropping, I will start to giggle because my mind will immediately go to the gutter.

Now, go get your own perfect game—just hope you don’t need to call in a relief pitcher.