Cut to the Chafe.....

Spring is in the air!  The days are longer, the sun is brighter, the grass is slowly getting greener, and the chafing is starting.  Wait…what? Chafing? Yep, chafing.  Chafing occurs when something restrictive or tight makes a part of the body sore by rubbing against it. In Tyler’s case, chafing occurs on his thighs from his sliding shorts.   He never has to tell me when it happens, I just know. Picture a bow-legged man walking after riding a horse for hours.  Yep. That’s my boy.  Luckily, he only experiences it once or twice a baseball season or anytime we go to the beach. 

Probably one of the worst times was last spring when we were in Florida.  Shenango played in Orlando around Easter time.  It wasn't hot, hot but it was definitely hot compared to western Pennsylvania.  Not only did the team have games at Disney’s Wide World of Sports, but they also had some free time to visit the Disney theme parks.  On the second day, I noticed the bow-legged-ride-a-horse-for-hours walk in my son.  Crap!  I ripped apart my suitcase for something that I could give him.  Oh man, I had nothing!  I went into the resort gift shop to see if they at least had some Vaseline I could buy.  They had none but the resort next to us had some and they would get it for me.  Whew!  Plus one for mom saving the day, right?  Wrong! The container was big enough for maybe one application on my chapped lips. Because we were visiting the "greatest place on earth", they felt they could charge $8! My son is 6’2” with some pretty big legs!

I started asking other parents for help. I have to say, talking with other baseball moms about chafing can be a colorful topic!   All of them had different products they used for their boys and none of them had a problem sharing their stories.  I loved it!

Probably the best product I learned about was Monistat Anti Chaffing Cream – Yes, the yeast infection company. So what? If the boys can get past the pretty purple packaging and the fact it’s found in the “woman” aisle, they will discover that it works for preventing chafing.  One possible side effect for baseball players, they may grow a vagina if they use it too much.

There are a number of other products available to help avoid the “chub rub”.  Here are a few that I have tried with Tyler:

Nike’s Pro Heist Baseball Sliding Shorts:  These sliding shorts feature strategically-placed flat-seam construction to reduce irritation caused by chafing.  I call bullcrap! What’s strategically placed for one player might not be strategically placed for another. 

Vaseline – We are all familiar with Vaseline and as you sit reading this, you might be picturing where you have yours stashed.  Supposedly rubbing it on the area where the baseball player usually chafes will provide a lubricant so that any rubbing together of the skin isn't irritating and won’t cause pain or rash. Early on we tried using Vaseline because, let’s face it, Vaseline can be used for everything!  Unfortunately, it never worked for Tyler.  However, I love using it for my chapped lips! 

Gold Bond Powder – This was recommended to me for Tyler’s chafing.  It’s a baby powder like product that is “medicated”.  I’m pretty sure by “medicated” it means that it is full of acid!  This stuff burns!!!  If you are already chafed and want to see what it would feel like to have your thighs dipped in acid, sprinkle it on! 

Monkey Butt – Okay, I've never tried this or even bought it but I love the name of it!  The first time I saw it in Walmart I snapped a picture and texted it to everyone! The powder contains talc or cornstarch which absorbs moisture.  Monkey Butt has a product for men, ladies and babies.   They even have a gift set called…..wait for it…..Bare Essentials!  

Body Glide – A liquefied powder that turns into a dry, silky shield against irritation and rubbing.  I just ordered some of this from Dick’s Sporting Goods.  I think it would be best if Tyler threw this in his baseball bag as opposed to the Monistat. 

Ceiling Fan:  This is a great product for “airing out”.  After taking a shower and thoroughly drying off with a clean towel, let the chafed legs  “air out” for a few minutes. Lay naked on the bed with the ceiling fan on.  Okay, okay, maybe not!  But you have to admit, when it’s hot and humid outside come mid-August, you’re going to try this! 

It isn't just athletes that can experience the ohhh-soooo-not-talked-about-chub-rub.  Everybody gets it. Fat, thin, inbetweenie -- thighs will be thighs! If you have ever experienced the feel of steam sizzling out from under your shorts because the friction from your inner thighs was creating a heat like none other, then you understand! Unfortunately, my thighs have separation anxiety and I swear, cannot be apart for a second.  While sitting at baseball games in the summer, I sweat…..a lot! Sweating while working out is good. However, sweating while trying to watch your son play baseball is bad! Throw in the dreaded boob-sweat and I’m a hot mess!  It’s hard to be witty, dazzling and sassy when I’m melting! 

So, bring on the Monistat.  I wonder if they sell it by the gallon?