Crying in Baseball?

Crying in baseball?

(This is a Facebook post I made in December 2013)

A little over 6 years ago a routine doctor visit turned into one I'll never forget. I sat in the doctor's office watching him as he read over a couple test results. "I heard the doctor say, 'I'm sorry, Kimberly, the test results show that you have cancer.' I heard nothing else. My mind went blank, and then I kept thinking, 'No, there must be some mistake.'" But I knew there was no mistake, it was real. My first instinct was to 'man up and deal with it'. With a business-like tone, I started asking questions....what are you going to do? How soon? And let's get this out of me as soon as possible.

After the appointment I sat in my car just staring at the steering wheel, knowing I had to tell my family. Then it hit me.....Tyler. My thoughts turned to him, my budding, young baseball player with God-given talent. 'What if I never get to see him play another game"? And then I lost it. I don't know how long I sat in my car sobbing--ignoring my ringing cell phone. Telling someone would make this nightmare real but eventually I made my first call. When I hung up the phone, I told myself, 'it will all work out". I decided not to tell Tyler right away. He had lost his grandmother a couple years prior to cancer and was still having issues with sleeping and anxiety.

That little boy became my rock....I clung to everything he did, especially baseball. I already knew a lot about baseball but I wanted to know more. I learned the game inside and out and Tyler and I talked endlessly about it. I watched every game, every inning, and every pitch. At the end of each game, I thanked The Lord above for giving me another opportunity to watch him play.

When he was 12, he switched travel teams. At one of the first tournaments, our team was in a stressful situation. We were up one run, bottom of 7th, bases loaded and 1 out. The coach called timeout and walked to the mound. He looked over at first base and nodded to Tyler. Tyler was going in to pitch. My heart was pounding and I wanted to vomit! Tyler never flinched and did his job with confidence and ease. After the final out, knowing he pulled it off, he looked at me with the biggest smile I've ever seen on that kid's face. It was then that I knew things were going to be alright---with baseball and life. Tears rolled down my face as I watched my son celebrate with his team. One of the coaches said to me as he walked past, "Hey, there's no crying in baseball".

Maybe, maybe not.....

To this day, I still thank God after every game and I still have not missed a single pitch Tyler has thrown.

As for crying in baseball, well, I'm a firm believer that as long as I'm wearing water-proof mascara, I can cry all I want!